Friday Noon
Dear –
This seems to be an ideal time to write. I am wondering that I did not see the advantage sooner. One of the things they used to joke about at the office was the, to them, peculiar case of my never taking off an house for lunch. Well, I never had anything to do and as a I grew tired of walking up Euclid Avenue I never stayed out more than thirty or forty minutes. The girls couldn’t understand that. I have very little do for the rest of the week and time is just dragging along. I try to appear busy but even then I can’t bluff all day. The boss has been sick this week, or I would have asked him for some new work.
I really think his absence is due more to the crape hanging chatter of the girls than to any real sickness. His eyes were troubling him and he had a cold, but it was nothing serious. However the girls were continually telling him how badly he looked and how serious his case might turn out to be. Of course after a few days of such cheering consolation he finally began to believe that he really should check up on his insurance policies and order the lilies. – Houlda Stern is about the most consoling of them all. I recall that during the few days before I quit working she was continually reminding me of how badly I looked and of how many painful operations and cases of pneumonia resulted from just such cases as mine. She is such a little beam of sunshine!
Listen, dear, I wish you would let me know your Cincinnati phone number and the name that it is under in the telephone directory. When you are better able to be up and around the house I shall want to talk to you. Before I call we will have to pre-arrange that day and hour so that I can be sure that you will be home at the time. I will call in the evening after the nite rates are on so that we may be able to talk as long as we wish.
There are some things that I can’t write and wouldn’t feel satisfied with an answer that didn’t come back immediately through your sweet voice. As I wrote before, this waiting between letters tends to jolt the train of thought, as it is four days and sometimes five before I receive a response and your reaction to my words. It is Friday and I yet do not know what you think of the opinions expressed in my Monday letter. It is very unsatisfactory, but still, sweetheart, I know it is the best means available.
(Time Out)
Later – 5.45
Gee, it seems as all my letters are getting to be on the serial type. They are terrible spasmadic, aren’t they? I am wondering whether receiving letters from me so often isn’t becoming tiresome, to you. You know, dear, there aren’t a great many interesting things in my everyday life and I am forced to write things that I often think must bore you. Are you tired of the sameness of them all?
Of course I have school this evening. I don’t know what the lecture will be on but I know that it will have to be very much to the point to hold my interest. Not being busy has given me a great deal of time to think and my thoughts at present are all jumbled up. Do you ever get that way after you have just let your mind wander from one point to another?
Now that we haven’t seen each other for over two weeks and you have been back in the home environment with your friends, – have you taken inventory of your attitudes? Do you feel exactly the same in regard to our common interest as you did when you left Cleveland? I have thought on the subject and frankly, honey, I find myself more attached to you, and much more optimistic. I am wondering how the separation has affected your thoughts towards me.
Stell, I think that this separation will prove a treat that perhaps will do much to show us our own minds. You know we are both young and we did become attached to each other in rather a rapid fire manner. I know that on my part it was inevitable, and I am becoming more certain every day that my mind will not change; – how are you thinking, dear? I know that you will be frank with me and if you do cease to care or feel that it it is not worth while to go on – you will let me know of the change. We must share confidences and be frank.
________________________________________-
At home
Stell, honey, I have just received and read your Wednesday letter, and had I read it before starting this letter – the beginning of this would have been much different. I have been anxiously awaiting the answer to my Monday letter. I wanted you to feel that I care until it hurts. Now, dear, please tear or burn my last two letters. I felt for some reason that your changed environment had changed your thoughts – but this letter has reassured me. Stell, I was just selfishly jealous – and I am sorry that I wrote as I did – of course I am jealous when I know that you are with other men and I feel like bumping their heads against the wall, – but, honey, I know that you must not sacrifice such things until I have the right to ask and you the desire to give. If our love can not stand such tests, – well it isn’t real love.
Stell, I too am afraid at times. I know that you will always be loved – and I wonder how I can ever live up to all that you deserve and desire. I have realized that love has and will always mean more in your life than in the life of the average woman. Dear, one of my first impressions of you, was as a very idealistic girl whose very nature took in the whole of her world to mother. You are that way, Stell, and the world will always come to you for protection and sympathy. You are the eternal mother! —
Stell, men will always love you, – that is why I sometimes am afraid. When I am close to you as your letter has brought me I do not fear, – but when I am alone and do not hear, – well I just see green.
I do understand your thoughts as to Harold and I rooming together and I want you to tell me your opinions. You are really closer than any friend could be and I need your confidences. You know I have a great respect for your intuition. I have decided the same as you advise. I can see that Harold and I would be incompatible and that we would be soon at loggerheads. Charley will be home for several weeks, so I shall have company. Then it will be but a short while until you return. When I can speak to you, dear, I need no one else.
This is to certify that Leon is quitting under compulsion as I threatened to place a shoe (his shoe) close to his scene of actions.
Charles D. Herbert
This is further to certify that I am in favor of “going on record” in having been [unreadable] informed as to your condition.
Charles D. Herbert
→ To interpret the above Greek – “He hopes you are well!”
As you can see my roomy forbids my writing more tonite. I shall complete this in the morning.
Love
Leon
Saturday Noon
This will have to be the last addition before I place a special delivery stamp on this letter and stick it in the box. I am working this afternoon, but think I shall quit early. It is so beautiful outside that I hate to stay indoors. Charley is coming downtown early and perhaps we shall go to the “Y” pool for a swim. It will be my first attempt in nearly two months and I hope that there will be several life guards on deck. I am planning on a quiet evening if my better ½ hasn’t planned anything for us. This quiet homelife is indeed a pleasure!
I had intended to do some shopping this noon, but this is much more interesting. I must make my spring purchases for the first time. Heretofore everything has been handed to me on a silver platter. I imagine that this new way will be a lot of fun.
Stell, when may I expect your picture? You mentioned that you had one that was taken a few years ago. Send anything just as though it is a likeness, and don’t be so particular.
Well, dear, I must cut this short of it may not reach you Sunday. There are a lot of things I want to write concerning your last letter but they will have to wait. I feel as you do, sweetheart, – that we will never really get down to a firm basis and understanding until we can talk our common problem towards its solution. Letters are so one sided and cold.
Always your
Leon
P.S. I am sometimes ashamed of the informal stationery and atrocious scribbling– but you know I must write when I can
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